Twin Farms, Kenton Bank Foot, Newcastle

Mar 7 2010 by Eddy Eats, Sunday Sun

The starters arrived within a reasonable time. My portion of paté was served with melba toast, a dollop of chutney and green salad. The paté was creamy, flavoursome and light, and the red onion marmalade provided a tangy contrast. The melba toast was a huge disappointment. It was hard as a rock, tasteless, with not a hazelnut in sight.

Meanwhile, Mrs Eats’ portion of soup was thick and creamy with chunks of moist ham. However, it was surprisingly bland. The three mini rolls that accompanied it were a little on the dry side, too.

Midway through our starter, I was aware of a waiter clutching what looked like our main courses. “Beef?” he said, ignorant of the fact we were still eating.

“We’re still eating our starter,” I pointed out.

“Oh. Well the chef’s sent them out. I’ll just leave them here,” he said, about to place them on the nearby windowsill!

“I don’t think so!” I barked.

Plates in hand, he sheepishly retreated back into the kitchen. When the mains did arrive, we feared the worst. Had they been sitting on the hot plate for the past 20 minutes? Thankfully not. We each had a good portion of meat, which was tender and full of flavour, and She Who Must Be Fed said her black pudding was nice and peppery. Our dishes came with a Yorkshire pudding and communal portion of veg with mashed suede, carrots, peas, mangetout and green beans.

On the down side, the roast potatoes were a little hard and the gravy was watery. Would the puddings fare any better?

Mrs Eats chose sticky toffee pudding served with butterscotch sauce and vanilla ice cream and I opted for the apple crumble with hazelnuts and caramel custard, both costing £4.25. Although hard to cut, the pudding was moreish and the butterscotch sauce delicious. The crumble was less inspiring, but offered a good ratio of fruit to crumble, and was pleasant.

Full, but slightly disappointed by the food and the service, we headed back to the Eatsmobile. Time to cultivate my appetite for next Sunday.