High heels are ridiculous

Sep 26 2010 by Ian Robson, Sunday Sun

I’M going to get hung, drawn and quartered for this, but here goes with an observation on high heels.

Woman in heels totters down the street, stumbles, and falls down. Is it a self-inflicted injury?

Of course it is. I can’t think of a more dangerous piece of clothing than shoes with ridiculously high heels.

You don’t find men risking their safety for the sake of pretending to be taller than they really are.

Experts at Northumbria University have launched a study into the reactions of men to women who wear heels.

Apparently there is academic interest in how changes in body posture are affected by choice of footwear.

Something to do, I understand, with the illusion of longer legs and a more prominent rear.

The truth, I suspect, has more to do with women trying to be bigger than nature intended.

The average height of a man is 5ft 9in while women are just 5ft 3in.

It’s not sexist to say so, it’s just the way it is, and heels are simply a way for women to feel superior.

(See, told you I was going to get hung, drawn and quartered.)

That’s why the daft mares risk damage to their feet by walking about with their ankles several inches above their toes.

The daftest sight of the week were fashion victims at the funeral of designer Alexander McQueen.

Heiress Daphne Guinness, trying to balance on black platforms, tripped on the cobbles.

I was only surprised it didn’t happen more often when you see the contraptions they were wearing.

There’s nothing like a public fall to bring women who wear high heels down to their proper size.

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