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Scotty splashes down instead of beaming up

Aug 10 2008 by Ken Oxley, Sunday Sun

CAPTAIN’S log, stardate 2008. Things didn’t go quite to plan today. In fact, we screwed up big style and accidentally scattered Scotty’s ashes over the Pacific Ocean. Oops!

I suspect James T Kirk might have written something along those lines in his famous diary had he witnessed the botched attempt this week to blast Star Trek star James Doohan into space.

The Scots actor, who played the Enterprise’s dour chief engineer, told relatives his dying wish was for his remains to boldly go where no man’s remains had gone before.

They duly obliged, enlisting the services of a space burial firm to beam Scotty into the Final Frontier.

Unfortunately, the rocket carrying his ashes blew up over the Pacific.

The company, called Celestis, apologised to the Doohan family for the cock-up and, bizarrely, promised to make amends using “back-up supplies”.

Excuse me? Back-up supplies? I wonder if the actor’s loved ones were aware that he was making his final journey incomplete?

Now it would appear there’s a piece of him in the ocean and another in a vault somewhere.

I guess that’s Scotty all over!

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