Footballers are dribbling fools

Jan 11 2009 by Ken Oxley, Sunday Sun

IF ever there was a week that demonstrated how Premiership footballers are divorced from reality, this has been it.

Granted that’s a statement that could apply to most weeks of the year and is about as surprising as night following day. But there has been something especially annoying about the latest rash of stories involving spoilt brat players.

First we had dopey Shola Ameobi calling cops to report a burglary at his home. Then he promptly called them back after it dawned on him that, actually, he’d just left the place a bit messy!

And this is a guy who earns more in a week than most of us are paid in a year. Scary, isn’t it?

But Shola’s stupidity was surpassed by team mate Obafemi Martins, who seemed to think it was OK to do 106mph in his Porsche because, well, he was late!

I kid you not . . . that was the best excuse he could come up with for driving at a speed that ought to have triggered an automatic ban.

Instead, he escaped with six penalty points and had to stump up £900 in fines and costs, which probably equates to a few minutes’ wages.

I’ve a feeling that if you or I had offered such a lame excuse for driving like a maniac we’d be on public transport faster than you can say “preferential treatment”.

Mind you, at least Martins managed to keep his car on the road, which is more than can be said for Cristiano Ronaldo. The £60m-valued World Player of the Year is renowned for his excellent control on the field of play. But something went badly wrong during what ought to have been a routine drive on the way to Manchester United’s training ground.

The result was a mangled wreck that used to be the star’s £200,000 Ferrari. Most people would have looked suitably fed up after such a costly prang, especially as the gleaming vehicle was a write-off. But Ronaldo was all smiles, presumably because the financial impact will be negligible.

In the past five years, the Portuguese international has splashed out £2m on cars, including a £350,000 Rolls-Royce Phantom with the £150,000 personalised number plate CR7, two Porsche Cayennes, a BMW M6, a Porsche 911, an Audi R8 and a Bentley Continental GT.

I know what you’re thinking . . . I’m just jealous, and I won’t deny it. You get the clear message that while the majority of us are scrutinising every penny of our outgoings, the Premiership elite are thinking “credit crunch, what credit crunch?”

However, my scorn is not down to envy alone. Unless there was something seriously wrong with that car, one might be inclined to think Ronaldo was driving recklessly.

Although he gave a negative breath test, it was reported that he is to be interviewed by police in a bid to discover whether he was speeding. Whatever the outcome, it’s clear he is lucky to emerge unscathed . . . and even luckier to avoid seriously injuring or killing someone else.

A law unto themselves? You bet.