No way to packet in!

Mar 13 2011 by Coreena Ford, Sunday Sun

THEY’RE the biggest downfall in my diet. Technically, I should be giving them up for Lent, but I couldn’t even manage the first day.

I’m still gorging on crisps in rather naughty quantities and can finish a packet of Walkers’ Sensations at an alarming rate.

Big Al says I eat more than he does and he’s probably right. Hard as it is for him to hear, I’m younger, possess a faster metabolism and a lot more nervous energy.

So this year I’m being a tad rebellious and refusing to cave in to the pressure and give up all the usual suspects – chocolate, wine, cake, chips – for Lent.

It seems to be a rule that every woman must have a problem with her weight and if she doesn’t then there must be something wrong.

Well, not with me. There’s plenty of hidden errors with my body but, to be honest, I haven’t the time to get hung up on them and I’m certainly not going to give myself a ‘Lent’ sentence when I see other people tucking into calorie- laden fast food meals and consuming pints of Guinness like they’re the only guests at a wedding reception.

But that’s not to say that I’m not giving anything up for 40 days. So I’ve spent the past few days thinking of my faults and habits which don’t just irritate others but irritate me.

For example, I’m a collector of newspapers. If I don’t read it one day then I save it for the next and the next. I have a pile of them by the bed.

Not any more. I’m giving up newspaper hoarding. I’m also giving up my slight OCD tendencies – I check the door five times before I leave the house and every label has to face the same way in the fridge.

And I’m trying to be more disciplined about my mobile phone. I constantly check it and it makes Big Al rather nervous, for obvious reasons.

I’m also intent on trying to smooth out my Brummie twang. My Midland vowel tones seem to creep into every sentence and ‘All right, bab?’ seems to slip out of my mouth more frequently than I’d like.

Big Al, meanwhile, wants me to give up my blonde moments so we can at least have 40 days without having to replace any crockery or glasses. I want him to take a break from his sarcasm.

So you see Lent doesn’t have to be about giving up food or alcohol. It can be about focusing on your own flaws and trying to adjust them. And if you haven’t started, then never fear. I haven’t either. I’ve just checked my latest texts. There is always next year.